Here are five things that are absolutely true, according to researchers at Harvard University, the U.S. federal government, and the Federal Bureau of Investigation:
When 6th graders at Lynbrook North Middle School type questions into Google, it greatly increases the likelihood that their thumbs will become permanently numb, and they will never be able to text again.
For the NY Giants, the penalty for winning the Super Bowl in 2012 is that they have to kick off from their own end zone on all kickoffs next year, while the other team gets to kick-off from the 50-yard line. This is to make games more fair.
When students at Lynbrook North go up the down stair case, they become disoriented and forget the combination to their locker.
When you eat a bagel and drink gatorade at the same time, they mix together in your stomach and expand slowly over time until the bagel grows 100 times in size and blocks all absorption of other food, forever.
The most important time for a middle school student to study his or her hardest is in the three weeks after Memorial Day.